Paisa Vasool

Ever realised that cinema halls are a great place to catch up on all the latest ringtones and all the happening gossip? I mean, whats wrong with people?? Why don’t they have simple public place propriety??? Okay, three sentences ending with a question mark. But seriously why don’t they shut the fuck up???? Another one ending with a question mark and yeah, I finally used the f word in my blog. But these people get on my nerve so much I can’t help it. There I am, spending as much money as the person next to me, to have my unadulterated cinema experience. But the person sitting around me always has other plans for sure. Somewhere in the middle of the film, a girl’s phone rings around me. I know its a girl because she picks it up, (c’mon that’s what mobile phones are for no matter where you are, yaar!), and then goes on to tell Rahul on the other side of the phone that she is watching a ‘good’ film with Chetan. And when she is done with Rahul, she turns around to Chetna, her girlfriend sitting next to her and they have a good laugh. You naughty girl, that’s what we call ‘Ek teer se do sheekar’ in hindi. You, my bright friend not only made your ‘guy’ jealous of a crossdresser sitting next to you, but successfully disrupted our film too. But then c’mon, somebody’s having fun. And if I am at all uncivil enough to ask them to talk softly ( I’d be a moron to take away their democratic right and ask them to shut up), either they go, okay(giggle-giggle), yes (like we mean it) or a plain ‘what’s-your-problem-i-paid-for-my-ticket-too-dude’ look which you can’t miss even in the dark cinema hall.

And if they are not talking on the phone, people talk amongst themselves. Somewhere down the line, they decide the film is not engrossing enough but then hey, they’ve paid for the ticket too, so what do they do? Simple, they catch up on gossip. And if that’s not enough, some go ahead and do the ‘cool’ things like throwing popcorns at each other. Its so disheartening to see that people don’t know their film. They just come to catch a flick. Once I was watching Dev, a Govind Nihalani directed, Amitabh starrer. A family which obviously ventured into the hall expecting a full blown amitabh movie got a surprise when they found out that it wasn’t exactly what they came in for. But they didn’t lose heart. So while the prosecution scene was happening on screen, the 8 year old of the family decided to recite a poem. He faltered at some point but his loving mother right on time corrected him. And the father? He must have dozed off. One happy family there.

Another time we were watching Mystic River, a poignant film about a father looking for his daughter’s murderer. Again there again was a gang who would talk non stop and their phones kept ringing through out the film, which they kind of stopped after some of us asking them to shut. And then in the film, a phone rang and pat one of the kids says, ‘ab usko band karne ke liye bolo’ and all of them laughed their heart out. You are too funny, man!.

Another time, another film. Monster, a woman serial killer’s story. A group of college kids, who came into the hall expecting a horror film, were so disappointed that one of them says aloud, ‘she is not a monster, she is a bitch!. And good time was had by all.

But jokes apart. Why people do this to others? How can they be so insensitive? Why don’t people learn some etiquette? Is it too much to ask?